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Mommy Style Monday: Keeping Romance Alive


Good morning friends and new friends! Today is Mommy Style Monday! Basically it means that today I've collaborated with a bunch of babes on how we keep our marriages great! If you're interested in joining in on the next Mommy Style Monday, contact Kiana or Madeline.


Spouse Unit is the best. He really is my other half. We don't have a perfect marriage, sometimes we get a little too sassy with each other, sometimes we are selfish, and we have differing opinions on things, but we love each other a whole lot and we have tons of fun!



Here are a few things we do to keep the love alive:

1. Humor. We love to make each other laugh, and will do just about anything to make that happen. Usually it means embarrassing each other on the dance floor (me), sporting a ridiculous getup, acting like Gollum (him, but I do make a pretty great Gollum) or doing a funny walk, making jokes, writing funny poems (him), and speaking in a weird voice. We do stuff like this often! I'm really happy we ended up together because I don't think anyone else would have appreciated our sense of humor half as much as we do.




2. Acts of service. They don't always have to be big acts. My service for Spouse Unit is usually doing laundry and cooking meals, but sometimes doing something big is needed. Last night I had a meeting for church, so Spouse Unit gave the girls a bath, put them to bed, cleaned the house, and when I got home there was a trail of lit candles leading through the apartment. He surprised me with a night to do whatever I wanted! He rubbed my feet and scratched my back (two of my favorite things, he does them almost every night), brushed my hair, braided it, and painted my nails for me. We also ate pupusas on our bed, listened to Spanish guitar, and talked. It made me feel so good! 
I need to step up my game. Maybe I can start with ironing. ;)

Not to mention writing me butter love notes. He knows what I like.

3. Working out together. We like to play sports together when we can, and currently we (are trying to) do P90X in the evenings after the kids are in bed. Sometimes we goof off, sometimes (a lot of the time) we don't do the whole workout, but the fact that we're working on something together helps us strengthen our marriage and our bodies. 

4. Communication. This is everything. Frequently we will check in with each other on how we're doing. We ask questions like "So, like what are your hopes and dreams?" (Name that movie), "How are you doing, really?", "What can I do to be a better spouse?", "How can I make this easier?", "How do you feel/what do you think about...._____________?" We communicate about finances, what to eat (I ask, he usually doesn't have an opinion, but still!), how our daughters are doing and funny things they do, how we can improve as parents, how we can improve as individuals, our self-doubts, our fears, our frustrations (and when we're frustrated with each other), what our day was like, simple things we enjoy, our childhoods, how we can reach our goals, EVERYTHING! I don't think that anything should be exempt from our conversations as husband and wife.

5. Intimacy. This shouldn't surprise you--we have 2 kids, after all. It is important and it strengthens marriages, and I'm going to leave it at that.

6. Date nights. We have joined up with a few other couples from our old ward/church group for something called "Kid Party!" Basically, we each take a turn watching each others' kids on Friday nights for a couple hours while the other couples go on dates. You have one night of babysitting a month and the other 3 Fridays you get a kid-free date! When you babysit, the kids eat a snack and do an activity (we usually have a movie night with popcorn or something). The kids love it, and the parents love the one-on-one time they get. Win-win. Sometimes we take the girls on dates, too, though. What's important is that you make the time to go!

Valentine's Dance 2017
7. Trying to be good parents. I can't tell you how attractive it is to me to see Spouse Unit interacting with the girls. I love seeing him read books to them, sing to them, teach them new things, chase them around the apartment, and invent new games. I know he feels the same about me when I'm patient with Tina and Lil Spits (even though it can be really hard), when I let them help me in the kitchen, snuggle them, and make them laugh. 


8. Public Displays of Affection, also known as hugs, kisses, and holding hands. We're not gross about it, but we love each other and want our kids and everyone else to know it. That ain't ever gonna fizzle, for shizzle.



9. Working together on projects. Every night Spouse Unit and I clean the house together. We also love coming up with killer Halloween costumes (get it? Killer? HAH.) eons in advance together, he gives me really helpful tips when it comes to my baking (I always sass him that I know better, then end up using all his ideas), we make awesome White Elephant gifts, and love cooking together (our favorite is homemade pasta and doing Iron Chef competitions). We also support each others' goals and try to work on achieving them together (school, baking business, speed skating, etc.).

See? Told you I make a great Gollum.


10. "Thank-you's, sorry's, and I-love-you's". The phrases are short, sweet, to the point, and they make a world of difference. Sometimes it's hard to say any of those things because we're just so dang mad or feel like everything the other does is to spite us. We know how to push each others' buttons but we rarely do it on purpose. Sometimes we do, but not often. When we get past our pride and selfishness and notice the nice things the other has done, that maybe they were right after all, and how lost we'd feel without each other, those three phrases seem to make everything sweet again. I also like to throw in a "nice bum" once a day.


There are so many things we can do to love our loved ones, but these are ten from us! What types of things do you do to keep the romance in your marriage?  


Check out these other lovely ladies' blogs to see how they keep the flame burnin' their relationships!

*Kiana at Glitter & Donuts
*Madeline at CaseyLand
Chandler at Life as a Larsen
Rachel at Tutus and Heels
Kahana at A Beautiful Life
Monica at It's All About
Andrea at Snow by Heart
Erica at Good Job Momma
Cayli at Nightchayde

 *Contact to join Mommy Style Monday

Thanks for reading, and see ya on the flip-flop!

Melissa
 

Comments

  1. I love that our number ones are the same! Must be pretty important then! :) love this list and you two make a very cute couple! ❤

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    1. It's true, though! Thank you! I loved your post!

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  2. You were such a good Gollum! Such a great list, too.

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    1. Haha thank you! We worked hard! I enjoyed your post as well! :)

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  3. This is fabuloso! You guys are so cuteee :)

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    1. Thanks Morg! You two are cuties too!

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  4. Melissa, I love everything you write! All of this was so spot on. You and your Spouse Unit were for sure MFEO (made for each other) and your adventures together prove it!

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    1. Thanks so much Madeline! I loved your equal lists for each other :) Thanks for letting me participate!

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